Monday, June 10, 2013

.....funk free.....

.....our summer has been official for 18 days and honestly, I am just now winding down and enjoying it.....

.....maybe it has been my hormones or the lack of good sleep I've had lately; but honestly until the other day at the beach, I could not kick my anxiety......I have been rushed and impatient, even though we haven't had much of a schedule.....I haven't been able to focus on one thing for long and I also haven't been able to complete any projects that I start.......since the beginning of our easy, breezy summer I have been a mess and I can't seem to put my finger on the whys of any of it.....

.....like all good funks, on top of the actual funk; I have been very unhappy knowing that I'm wasting good days of summer fretting on why I can't seem to enjoy them.....and the snowball effect begins......

.....until this moment......


....with one exhale, while watching my girls play together; my prayers were answered......their adoration and sweetness for one another somehow melted away this burden that has been weighing me down.....the sun was hot, Brody was happily playing with his bucket and shovel next to me on our blanket, my belly bulged with baby joy and the girls had chosen this moment to love one another without hesitation......it was a surreal experience where the whirlwind of anxiety actually spiraled away and I could physically feel a wave of peace come over me.....

....I have not been able to pinpoint the root cause of what had put me in a funk and it doesn't matter at this point......there is no life changing event happening behind the scenes......no career crisis, no health implications, no major decision looming that has been weighing us down.......compared to a year ago, our life is stable and clear......we have much to be thankful for and the blessings that we have been given overflow......but, like many of you, I go through life coming in and out of different seasons and sometimes I can reflect very clearly on the emotions of them and sometimes, as in this case, I don't have an answer.....

.....so for this season, we will just blame it all on hormones......

....two and half weeks ago and pre undiagnosed funk, we celebrated Elsie leaving nursery school to begin her final summer before the real deal of Kindergarten is before us this August......


.....she shined at her ceremony and adored the celebration and the attention.....






.....and I adored not only all the ways in which my first born has grown this year, but the opportunity for a family photo which doesn't happen often enough.....


.....but we had extra loved ones to celebrate with us, as my Mom and her husband popped in for the week to join the party and check out our new suburban digs......


.....we explored, we ventured out in a lot of rain, we shopped, we ate, we laughed and we lounged.....





.....and Coleman, who the kids call Poohpop was the biggest sport of all.....Elsie busted out her face paints; the ones she paid $13 for at the grocery store.....she eye balled them for months until she had done enough chores to earn the one and only thing she has wanted to buy since September.....I tried to talk her out of it, but this is what she wanted and she was thrilled to spend her own money on them......




....and we still think the girls' final masterpiece is pretty funny.....


.....summer is in full swing......

.....we are ready for road trips to the city, friends in and out of our home, outdoor fun, late nights when the sun still shines, beach days, summer reading and ice cream every day......





.....and thanks to these little angels who unknowingly helped their momma see the light, I can enjoy it funk free......


No comments :