.....I didn't intend for it to happen, but as I was gathering photos for this blog post, I came across a "recovered file" on my MAC......as I sorted through it, I found all sorts of old videos and pictures off an iphone that I used to have when both girls were one and two......I got lost in the pictures and videos; simultaneously longing for those days when the girls were so little and also appreciating the conversation and enjoyment I have with them now......and then the videos appeared when sweet Brody joined us......the snapshots and video clips quickly reminded me how living in such small NYC quarters in that phase of life was a blessing and a stress at the same time.....so now I am back to the present and enjoying it five years later.....
....the timing of finding this "recovered file" was perfect, as it brought me back to the days when motherhood was still so new.....and here we are, seven years into it and both Stefan and I are still learning, still in awe at this incredible responsibility of parenthood and are even more joy filled then we were when the days were much simpler and slower paced......
......this past weekend and all day yesterday, we celebrated our fist born turning seven.....
.....she wanted pink, she wanted a pony and she wanted a petting zoo.....so we turned our backyard into a little haven for 18 of her best girl friends and we had a little show down that surely did not disappoint......
....I heard the rustling around upstairs before 6am when I was having my coffee with Mae.....and the duo emerged all geared up and ready to go.....the countdown for Elsa's fall fest was on......the joy and excitement about parties, cake, friends, goody bags, and holidays is contagious and I love the buzz that it creates it our house.......I could use a little less craziness with the running and jumping and yelling, but we are learning that's all part of it too.....so we take the it all in stride......
....the day was on the frigid side, but it was gorgeous......we had abundant sunshine and the children were dressed to play.......they are immune to temperatures below 40 degrees.......it made the animals a little livelier and the hot chocolate tasted that much sweeter.....
......friends were reunited, farm animals were dotted on, old school games were brought outside, we had dear friends stay and help us man the party and the girls were saying good bye in no time at all......
....and it dawned on me as we were setting up for the party that this very well could be the last "birthday party" we throw for Elsie......granted, we have not thrown 7 of them since we do the parties on the odd years......so technically this is our fourth one we have thrown......but will she want a party at age nine?.....when she is on the verge of tweendom?......probably not.....I am guessing she will opt for a sleep over with close friends or another event that isn't all about inviting your entire class.....so there was a part of me that lost track of details that no one would have noticed otherwise......and letting those go; like handing out bandanas or fussing over the craft that flopped, went to the wayside just so I could be still, step back and watch it all fully present.....
....I could be wrong......this very well may not be the last party she has in our backyard, but I have a strong suspicion that it was.....and so I irritated several little girls to stop what they were doing around half time just so I could capture the group at our Farm Fest.....the first grade wonder......the sweetness that all of these girls had toward one another......
.....it was such a great group of girls......all playing with one another, all including each other in events and games and all encouraging each other.....
.......my heart was happy and so, so full......
(and sweet Mae was napping by this time)
......and so as we came off the high of this weekend and celebrating you in a grand way, Elsa Grace; the timing of finding these old pictures was remarkable.....
.....you have always had a special sparkle in your eyes.....I so clearly remember this day at the park with you, as it was late summer and I was planning your first birthday with other friends in our building.....your eyes have gleamed with sheer joy since the day you were born and even as a bright seven year old, you still find excitement and wonder in all things.......
....you have aways loved being outside, exploring God's creation......and of course, you have always had such a dear affection for your Daddy......
.....you can be serious, goofy, inquisitive and silly all in one breath......
(and your resemblance to baby Mae is astounding- so I had to add a picture of the two of you at the same age!)
.....Elsa, 12 months.....
.....Mae, 12 months......
......you have set such an incredible example to your siblings on how to show love to others, how to be compassionate, how to laugh at mistakes, and how to find the wonder in all things......
......I know that God created you to be someone He has already intended you to be......He has a future paved out for you and has given you gifts and talents that are specific to you......
.....there are people in your life you will impact......there are people in your little 7 years you have already made better by just being you......you are loyal, loving and considerate......
.....and you love to have fun.....
.....we have loved every phase of parenting you, Elsa....and I only hope that we can help you grow into the person that God made you to be.....I hope we can encourage you, comfort you, love you, discipline you, teach you and protect you as best as we can......it is those things that I pray for when I seek wisdom on how to ensure we give you all that you need.....our love for you is so bountiful, so deep and will never waver.....
....and our heart bursts just as much for your siblings; as you are all so incredibly special and unique in your own ways.....
.....happy lucky seven, Elsie.....
(and can't wait to hear what the tooth fairy leaves you, too)
.....you will forever be the one who made me a mama.....
.....thank you for being you.....
.....I love you to the moon and back.....
Xx Mama