Wednesday, August 12, 2015

......the last IT.......

Just having a moment of mama reflection tonight.

.....do you ever look at your child and wonder when "it" will be the last time?......."It" can come in many forms or fashions......."it" can be the last time that you are on your hands and knees cleaning food off the kitchen floor because sooner or later, your child does stop throwing food......it can be the last time you nurse your baby, the last time you strap your baby into a bucket seat or the last time you get to push your toddler on the swing..........because one day you wake up and that little baby has grown immensely over night and no longer fits in the bucket.......just as one day, your 3 year old hops on the swing to show you that they can pump themselves into a high soar on the play ground alllll byyyyy themselves......

.....there have been countless moments for me as a mother when I had no idea that "it" was my last.....

......I had forgotten this until this past summer......most recently, my "it" was Mae's wave......she does the cutest hello and goodbye wave......she waves vertically, instead of horizontally......she thrusts her little hand up and down, up and down......and it can stop me in my tracks......I can be stressed, tired, or ridden with anxiety about something I shouldn't be worried about; but when I see that wave, I am engulfed with endearment and laughter......

......days and weeks passed and each day I said to myself that I needed to capture it on video because I wanted to archive this little gesture of hers for the years to come......so I went to capture it on video while we were in Texas, begging her to wave to her cousins and you know what?.....she waves the "correct" way now.......no more vertical shimmy......no more up and down jostling.....no more stopping me in my tracks to laugh with her about the cutest wave I had ever seen......

......and the last time she did that sweet little wave, I had no idea it would be "the last time".......

.....all the mamas of the world can be worn down by summer........there is a lack of schedule, bedtimes are off, the days can be long, the children all seem to have boundless energy and we can get tired, fatigued, and weary......so weary that we have thoughts of summer needing to end quickly and desires of getting back to a school schedule, opposed to a lack of one......

......try this perspective......look at your babes in a different light.....recognize something they do today that they may not do in a week, a month, 6 months from now or next year......focus on it, inhale it, cherish it, love it and love them.......they are changing by the second and once that second has past, we won't get that moment back because it will have been the last of "it"......

.....and then you'll be wishing for the days of summer to be back again.....

Xx