.....two week hiatus......

.....I am returning from a two week spring break from this precious blog.....this sweet virtual space that allows me to reflect and be thankful......time off is essential, just so that it never begins to feel like a "job" to keep up with the moments in our family that I choose to document and archive......I can not say that I've come back refreshed, as I packed up the kids and drove to Baltimore while Stefan was on a business trip......a far cry from a relaxing vacation reading and sun bathing on the beach......but my cup was filled with quality time with two old friends who I sorely miss......and rejuvenating the soul can be just as good as basking on the beach in a different kind of way......

.....so to recap my two weeks away from this blog, I will highlight the best of the best......

.....our third annual High Tea at the Plaza......

.....this trip never gets old......this year, we added the adventure of hopping on the train in our Sunday best to make our way to NYC......

.....my girls can still hail a cab, a skill I find to be essential at a very young age.....

......and dear Eloise was waiting for us, just as she has every year before us.....

....we get more and more adult time every year, as the children get older and behave like little gentlemen and ladies......

.....with the exception of multiple requests for more cherries.....and when I use the word multiple, I mean this poor waiter was asked at least 15 times for more, please.....

.....we bagged the cherry servings after one of the babes ate so many they were sick.....

....but filling up on cherries meant there was more of this for the mommas to share.....

....and a plate full of decadence plus several four and five year olds who have grown up together and still love each other dearly is enough to make this tradition one of my favorites......

.....our iphones could only buy us a small window of time post tea to wrap up conversations with so many old neighbors who I miss dearly......

.....the sugar highs kicked in and had us hailing our waiter for the bill in a hurry......

.....Sara, all of your effort of coordinating so many people's schedule to keep this tradition going is worth it......thank you for planning it each year.....it is not easy to do, especially as life gets more fast and furious for all of us, but we appreciate the tradition this has now become.....

.....and I must admit, as much as I loved the trip, I was anxious to get back to suburbia.....the beauty of our little town in the spring has me counting my blessings every day that we can still experience NYC, yet spread out in our house and our yard......

.....truly, the best of both worlds.....

.....pinkalicious......

....Daddy has been knocked up again......he came home to wheels of paint color slapped all over the counters and jars of samplers opened and splashed on the wall in lines.....whenever this happens, he knows what the next few days have in store for him......

....my inspiration comes in waves, as I like to break between projects and enjoy the newness of what the most recent venture has brought me.....I let the inspiration simmer until I am inspired by something new.....and when the fresh tidal wave of ideas comes to me, it is intense and urgent........it is all I think about and I want it done yesterday......

.....since it is the girls' room, they were excited to help and Stefan is the most patient when it comes to his helpers......

....give him a few hours to perfect his trim, add another coat, let it dry and wallah......

.....final pics to come, as we are still working on the final touches......

......I will say that the source of my inspiration was our highly anticipated new bedding.....my dear friend and talented seamstress, Stephanie helped me take an inspiration piece and designed and created both girls bedding......her final masterpiece left me speechless......

....she surprised me with every detail and for the first few days, I would spend many long moments just staring at our new bedding in awe of her work......

.....and in between my moments of adoration for her work, the wave of inspiration hit me and the scrambling for the perfect pink began......

.....a link to Stephanie's store can be found here in case you, too, have your heart set on something beautifully made with dreamy fabric...... 

.....Elsie and Callie, what's for dinner?......

......the girls find it rather empowering to choose our meal for the night.....we let them decide our last Sunday supper, as we usually eat early and we always have a family meal to close out the day of rest......leave it to NickJr.com to guide the girls.....

.....Ni hao Kai-lan's favorite is veggie stir fried rice, so that became dinner.....

.....packed with veggies and scrambled eggs, it is now a staple for us too......

.....my little mermaids.....

.....I am still in awe that in a few short months, my girls went from being afraid to put their faces into the water to full on swimmers.....they dive, find rings at the bottom of the pool, swim the full length from wall to wall and never want their lesson to be over......

.....this will be the great summer of green, chlorine streaked hair and wrinkled finger tips.....

.....bring it on!......

.....music with Mr. Paul.....

.....my favorite NYC musician made his Darien, CT debut.....we threw together a few outdoor music classes in our backyard to kick off spring and the kids went nuts.....

....it was a little chilly, as spring had had a late start this year.....but we bundled and enjoyed our buddies with some of the best kid music out there.....

.....we will definitely be rockin' to more of Paul as spring sets in full swing.....

......beach bound......

.....one of the top drivers to our area was 1. our new town had to be less than an hour to the city and 2. it had to have a beach, as this FL girl dearly misses her roots.....

....the first "warm" week of high 50s had us to the beach three times in five days......I can not get enough of it and neither can my kids......

....summer will beckon me here every day......every. single. day.......

....amen to salt and sand.....

.....one on one time with Brody......

......my Thursday morning Mom group has wrapped up for the end of the year, which has opened up a few hours for me to bask with my boy alone.....we have taken long walks, tried new parks, seen old friends and have literally laid around in the grass picking up rocks, ants and sticks.....soaking him in all to myself has been dreamy......

.....blog, it feels good to be back....

....happy full on spring......

....two years......

.....tomorrow is Brody's second birthday......in the two years since he has beautifully changed the dynamic of our family, he has endured many nicknames......Brotha Brotha, Buddy Buddy, just plain old Buddy, Bud, and Spud......but mostly, we call him Buddy......there is no rhyme or reasons to these names.....we follow the lead of the girls, as they drive the nickname rituals.......although, I prefer to call him my little boyfriend......I am the only one who can call him this and I usually tell him when we have our moments of just the two of us......

.....for the last two years, he has been attached to me......strapped to my chest, bundled in a sling while nestled across my body and most recently, he has been super glued to my right hip.....when I look at him and take time to study his features, I still see my baby......

.....but my heart has expanded and I love him deeper, more intimately and our connection is now a two way street.....

....I always savor the moments of knowing that after just a few steps away from me, he turns to make sure I am still near him.....he will usually beckon me with his sweet voice, c'mon momma, shortly after his glance......I breathe in these moments.....even in the midst of girls whining, running late for something, a leaking diaper, or sister screaming 20 feet away to be pushed on the swing; I stop and savor his walk away glance back over his shoulder, smiling at me......because it is one of those things when you never really know when it will be the last one......they will gradually fade and happen less frequently as he enters a new phase of independence; until one day, he will leave my side and he will not look back......

.....but for now, he is only two and I am inhaling the here and now......

.....right now, he adores his sisters and is a champ when it comes to putting up with princesses.....

....he receives so much love from the girls that it only takes one moment of watching them interact and any mess from the day dissolves.....managing three little ones can certainly take its toll, but watching the love unfold between them is worth any tough day of tantrums, cat fights, whines or tattle tailing......

....right now, his sweetness is memorizing.....

.....he is funny, loves Mickey Mouse, gets frustrated when we can't make out his sentences, loves to spot airplanes and hollers for Elsie at the break of dawn......he has figured out she can get to him the fastest and can hurdle him over his crib railing so he can make his way to our bed with his best book and his blanket......

....right now, he loves to be outside.....loves to be barefoot, loves to keep up with the big kids, loves to toss a ball, loves to wave a sword, a stick or a broom.....and hit someone with it.....he loves to read, loves to play with other little boys and prefers to wear something with a super hero donned on the front.....

....he laughs a lot, he is loud, loves to copy and mimic the girls and adores being the center of attention.....he tells me he loves me too every time I tell him I love him......every. single. time.

....pinch me.....

.....there will be many moments that will be the last in this next year, but there will also be newness ahead as he embarks into becoming more of a little boy.....

.....to think that I wanted three girls at one point......girl was all that I knew and I thought that three of them would be right for me.....I am so grateful that God chooses what is best for us......He knit this child to be beautifully and wonderfully made just the way he intended and it has been more than I could have ever imagined......

.....my son, you have been a perfect gift.....may the Lord bless you and keep you, may he shine his light on you and be gracious unto you, may he turn his face to you and give you peace......

...I love you, Brody.....

....please keep glancing back at me because I will always be waiting to return your glance with a smile.....

.....choosing where to dwell.........

....today was a tough day.....lots of over tiredness in the house.....plenty of whining, yelling, arguing, negative tones, not feelin' like sharin' attitudes......a few accidents that caused a lot of screamin' and demands for bandaids......and it all escalated to a swat on the tush for my oldest because sometimes a little has to understand the seriousness of disobeying.....

....but sometimes flipping through my daily camera roll gives me a dose of what I choose to focus on at the end of a day like today......I choose to dwell on the good.....the moments of time, although maybe brief; that were caught in a happy moment on a day that was enough to put me over.....

.....I said goodbye to my friend Eva two weeks ago tonight.....she died four days later and I am so abundantly blessed by how God granted me one last opportunity to be by her side.....Her funeral was on Thursday and she has been heavy on my heart for months, although especially now.....

.....I met Eva through a church event that I did with another friend......every Thursday we would set up the basement of the church and have stations of toys for littles......a book nook, a train track, a pretend kitchen, a baby doll area for the budding nurturers......mommas would chat and drink coffee and we would play with our children until it was time for a short bible story and a craft......week in and week out, it was just a handful of us from church, as we waited to see if any neighborhood mommas would join us.....it was discouraging that our event wasn't growing like we had hoped and there were many days we wondered why we continued to stick with it?.....

.....Eva walked in on a gorgeous spring day when I thought, certainly no one would show up to an indoor event; especially with a Manhattan blue skyline and warm weather after a brutal winter.....but she surprised all of us.....

.....I will never forget her sporty attire and how she pulled it all together so well......her converse were loosely laced, her sheer cotton scarf was wrapped stylishly around her neck and her skinny jeans had holes in all the right places.......he blond hair was pulled back effortlessly and her beautiful smile radiated the room....radiated it.....

......her blond boys trailed behind, unsure of the new place; but looking to their momma for cues that this new place would be safe, okay......even fun.....

....Eva came every Thursday from that point on and her friendship bloomed with all of us......she also got involved with our church and our bible study.....I am so humbled at how God used that event in the basement, which to us felt pointless; but to Him was part of his master plan.....he honored our efforts by knitting Eva into our group, revealing himself to her and giving her such a strong network of friends and family to hold her hand during the last two years of her fight with cancer.....

....Eva knew this and she chose to be thankful for it.....

......when I was a new momma of three in NYC, I remember Eva offering to help me get home from our church play date when Brody was a newborn.....Elsie was only a young three year old and Callie was a young two.....I only had two spots in the stroller and neither girl was thrilled about having to walk home......Brody was still too tiny to wear in my carrier and we had not bought our kick board for Elsie yet.......Eva asked one of her boys to get out of her double stroller so that Elsie could have his spot.......she walked my route with me, pushing Elsie and her youngest son; all while she carried Johnny on her shoulders for four blocks.....a win win for all....

.....people stared and she smiled back, but only between her encouraging words of how sleep would come again one day, I could do it with my eyes closed and when could she take my girls off my hands so I could have some quiet time around the apartment......

.....you see, Eva chose to find good in all things.....she made the decision to find the pure in the un-pure,  and she basked in what she did have, opposed to what she did not have.....

....she rid herself of joy suckers and instead, applied her efforts to choosing good, love, kindness and faithfulness.......

....she braved chemo until it stopped working.....coming off her 10 hour cocktail; only to read her boys a story at night, tuck them in and then catch up on the laundry.....the mundane things that most of us complain about were a state of mind for Eva.....she chose to find joy in every little thing.....

.....I miss her terribly, but am left not only with her memory; but the inspiration that there is beauty in all things.....

.....today, tomorrow and all days ahead, as long we we make the choice to find it......

....my ballerina turns four tomorrow and I have more cupcakes to frost.....

....how very blessed I am....

"I am the resurrection and the life. Whoever believes in me, though he die, yet shall he live" -John 11: 25